al-Sharif al-Radi (d. 406 AH) · Thaqalayn library edition, reproduced verbatim
فَتَدَاكُّوا عَلَيَّ تَدَاكَّ الاِْبِلِ الْهِيمِ يَوْمَ وِرْدِهَا، قَدْ أَرْسَلَهَا رَاعِيهَا، وَخُلِعَتْ مَثَانِيهَا، حَتَّى ظَنَنْتُ أَنَّهُمْ قَاتِليَّ، أَوْ بَعْضُهُمْ قَاتِلُ بَعْض لَدَيَّ، وَقَدْ قلَّبْتُ هذَا الاْمْرَ بَطْنَهُ وَظَهْرَهُ حَتَّى مَنَعَنِي النَّوْمَ، فَمَا وَجَدْتُنِي يَسَعْني إِلاَّ قِتَالُهُمْ أَوِ الْجُحُودُ بِمَا جَاءَ بِهِ مُحَمَّدٌ(صلى الله عليه وآله)، فَكَانَتْ مُعَالَجَةُ الْقِتَالِ أَهْوَنَ عَلَيَّ مِنْ مُعَالَجَةِ الْعِقَابِ، وَمَوْتَاتُ الدُّنْيَا أَهْوَنَ عَلَيَّ مِنْ مَوْتَاتِ الاْخِرَةِ.
They leapt upon me as the camels leap upon each other on their arrival for drinking water, having been let loose after unfastening of their four legs till I thought they would either kill me or kill one another in front of me. I thought over this matter in and out to the extent that it prevented me from sleeping. But I found no way except to fight them or else to reject what-ever has been brought by Muḥammad (S), I found that to face war was easier for me than to face the retribution, and the hardships of this world were easier than the hardships of the next world.
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